January 5, 2007

Lohan Needs a Wake Up Call

Is it just me or is Lindsay Lohan turning into this generation's Elizabeth Taylor? The girl is what, 20? And she's been in the hospital more than your average 80 year old! I'm thinking that she should fire her agent for not getting her a guest spot on ER or Grey's Anatomy. Hell, the girl has been in the hospital enough in the past year that she should be able to write the scripts, if not diagnose her own ailments.
Lohan irks me. In a major way. She supposedly has talent. Acting talent. I don't see it, but okay. If she does indeed have talent, acting talent, shame on her for squandering that. How many movie stars in Hollywood truly have talent? I can probably count them on my fingers. Maybe my toes too, on a good day, but the prerequisite for being a movie star no longer involves talent. It's all about image, how you come across on film . . . and maybe how many scandals you've had.
It's miraculous that Lohan has yet to marry. She did drop a somewhat light hearted hint in an interview that maybe she would run off to Vegas and pull a Britney, and marry someone for a day or two to see what it's like. How much more depressing can that possibly be? Teen girls think Lohan is the greatest (beats me) and idolize her, and she is suggesting, in print no less, that marriage is an institution to be taken so lightly that for fun, you should just run off to Vegas and marry someone, to see what it's like. Kind of like trying skydiving, or ceramics. Just to see what it's like.
I am torn between feeling sorry for this girl and being flat out astounded at her mindnumbing stupidity. When she opens her mouth, it speaks volumes about her own parents. Dina Lohan would never be a candidate for Mother of the Year, but when you analyze her daughter's life, particularly over the last two years, the argument for mandatory sterilization makes a whole lot of sense.
So back to Lohan and Elizabeth Taylor. Lohan's rep claims that Lohan has been hospitalized (again) to have her appendix taken out. Is that code for something else? Back in the Golden Era of Hollywood, medical code was freely used to allow celebrities to have a rest, rehab or abortion, under the guise of an appendectomy, or tonsillectomy. Have we really changed that much? I don't think so. I think it's far more likely that Lohan is having a breakdown, or terminating an unfortunate event, or getting some type of cosmetic surgery (Lord only knows what she's put her body through in such a short time) - - any of the things that her publicist would prefer the general public does not know. Far less likely, although much needed, is the possibility that Lohan is in rehab. Would she really keep that under wraps? She is so fond of claiming to be a year-long member of Alcoholics Anonymous. Sadly, in today's society, such an admission is not one made with shame and guilt, but guaranteed to make the headlines and make someone like Lohan seem even more trendy to the gullible and susceptible teen girls who think Lohan is the ideal role model.
So can Lohan possibly be this generation's Elizabeth Taylor? Not likely. Taylor possessed a beauty and self-awareness that Lohan could never grasp. Taylor, even at 20 or 25, was already a legend and not because she threatened to burn out before she really knew herself. Taylor certainly had her share of scandals but they seem almost tame today. And Taylor, even when stealing Eddie Fisher from Debbie Reynolds, didn't seem to be acting out of a desperate need for publicity, but rather out of a selfish and misguided sense of wanted to be loved and needed.
No, I think it's far more likely that unless Lohan gets a strong wake up call, she will be this generation's James Dean. Living fast, living hard, dying young.

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