September 21, 2007

The Denise and Charlie Show Soldiers On

Photo Source: DListed
Didn't these two get divorced like twenty years ago? Sheesh.

Okay, maybe it was really only a year or two ago, but Denise and Charlie are obviously attempting to best Britney and K. Fed as the most acrimonious and drawn-out divorce in Hollywood.

Just as a refresher, Denise originally left Charlie when she was six months pregnant with their second daughter. They attempted a reconciliation after the birth, but it failed - - as is wont to happen with overblown egos, crazed hunger for publicity, drugs and internet porn. Denise filed papers with the court, stating that Charlie was abusive, had a problem with drugs and alcohol and more specifically, a problem with porn involving children. She then promptly took up with her former friend Heather Locklear's estranged husband, Richie Sambora. Charlie, meanwhile, denied the charges and took up with some random interior designer.

Fast forward a year or so. Charlie and Denise are divorced. Denise and Richie Sambora are no more. Heather Locklear is probably laughing. Charlie and his random interior designer are now engaged. Charlie still has his Two and a Half Men sitcom. Denise is no longer welcome in Canada after that whole laptop-throwing-at-elderly-women incident. You know those Canadians are so touchy.

Lo and behold, Denise files papers in court, seeking protection for her children from Sheen. She is specifically concerned about Sheen's alleged attraction to underage girls and allegedly showing his frank and beans to random posters on the internet. Her spokesho claims that "She believes that Charlie has significant personal issues which he has failed to address and which require her to take action to protect her children. This is not a vindictive action. Any responsible parent in Denise's shoes would go to the ends of the Earth to protect her children." Uh, yeah. This is the same woman who's been accused of alerting the media as to where she'll be with her children so she can get some positive press, right? Tom Cruise would be proud!

Not to be outdone, Charlie's spokesho fired back with promises that Denise would see her day in court and the truth will prevail because it always does. Wow, that sounded very Smallville. Is Charlie part of the Justice League?

As if that's not enough (and for most of us, it surely would be), Charlie's fiancee has gotten into the mix. Probably because Denise has claimed that Charlie has only gotten engaged to make the covers of magazines. Something Denise can probably relate to. She's probably pissed that Charlie thought of it first. She also bemoans that their poor children had to find out about it from the television. I'm calling bullcrap right here because their kids are like 2 and 3. Do they watch Access Hollywood? Or the E channel? I'm thinking that they aren't going to interrupt Sponge Bob or Dora for a newsflash about Charlie Sheen's twenty-seventh engagement.

So Charlie's current sucker, I mean fiancee, has fired back, alleging that she has 40 emails from Denise that will ruin her, but is trying to take the high moral road and not release them. Seeing as how Denise has already released a few emails that the fiancee sent her, I'm guessing it's only a matter of time before we see some turnabout. Like right before the season premiere of Two and a Half Men?

I love it when wealthy people are so trashy.

No comments: