Like clockwork, the gayest little elf in all the land came out to celebrate the birth of our nation and, ostensibly, to look for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow (sorry, Tommy, Becks wasn't in town last weekend).
I say like clockwork because the Cruiseazies have been uncomfortably absent and quiet as of late - - and last week, Tommy's bought-bot got some typical bad press. This time about tickets for "her" Broadway show not selling. Why pay $125 for theater tickets when you can rent "Galaxina" or "The Stepford Wives" for $4 at Blockbuster?
Is Tommy auditioning for "Brokeback Mountain 2"? What's with the cowboy hat? I guess he's trying to look more "of the people" (and add a good 3 inches onto his short stature) but I know he was just dying to add some sparkles, sequins and feathers to that hat. Oh well, what's a good gay to do but put on some Mom jeans and drag his beard along? (Speaking of which, Tommy, you may want to lay off the Twinkies and Ho-Hos - - you're looking a little thick around the midsection).
Suri is festive enough with the July 4th headband, but could they not wipe her mouth? And why is she showing about as much excitement as her mother does on a daily basis? Obviously Katie forgot to plug Suri in the night before and recharge her. You know what that means - - more auditing and maybe the cans for Katie.
Speaking of Katie, how bad does she look? Is Tommy trying to turn her into a man? (It's working.) Is she auditioning for the role of the horse in "Brokeback Mountain 2"? Questions, questions.