Clay Aiken obviously has a desire for thousands of Lambertinis to descend upon him and rip his nasal hairs out one by one. How else to explain why Aiken got his panties in a twist and rode his Huffy bike all over Adam Fucking Lambert?
Aiken blogged on his website (available to you crazy Claymates for the low, low price of $30 per year) to call out not only American Idol for sucking in general but to slam the iconic magical savior of the world himself.
Aiken said American Idol specifically looks for contestants who were already polished, versus searching for raw, undiscovered talent. While that is obviously true in some cases (Carly Smithson; Joanna Pacitti; even Adam Fucking Lambert was on stage prior to Idol) it is also not completely true. I would hardly consider Douchey Geekey to be polished (unless you want to consider him a big polished chunk of cheese), or Breakfast Club or even Cookie from last year.
Aiken did blog that he felt Care Bear's win this week was more a message the viewers were sending about not wanting to be told who to vote for and blatant favoritism - - which does have a certain truth to it.
However, he then ruined any possibility of making a valid point by stating that Adam Fucking Lambert's performance of "Ring of Fire" caused him to think his ears would bleed. Bitch, please. Baby Jesus cried rainbows tears of pixie dust hearing that. "Contrived, awful and slightly frightening"?
Aiken better watch his back. Adam could send him into a parallel universe with the simple beam of an eye. He could summon a herd of guyliner wearing unicorns to do his bidding. At the very least, he could sic KISS on Aiken.
Team Lambert all the way!