And no, it wasn't Tom Cruise and it wasn't a job pretending to be his wife for some bank. Hypothetically speaking, of course.
The brilliant mind behind Pan's Labyrinth, Guillermo del Toro, has had a serious lapse in critical thinking skills and has somehow allowed the Bride of Scientology to be signed on to his latest project, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark. Based on a 1973 television movie, Dark is about a young girl who moves into a house only to find that it's inhabited by devilish monsters. In other words, The Katie Holmes Story (after moving in with Tom Cruise).
The Bride of Scientology is apparently been cast to the play the girlfriend of the father of the young girl. Does the girlfriend die relatively quickly because I think a corpse is the only thing Katie is truly qualified to play at this point. She does it so well daily now.
Filming starts this summer in Melbourne, meaning that either Melbourne will sadly be inundated by all things "TomKat" or we will be inundated by press stories about how much Katie loves Melbourne and really wants to move there, only Tom wants to stay in L.A. I think Katie would love Hoboken, Detroit or Barstow and love to move there, only because that's where Tom isn't. Maybe she's not as dumb as I previously thought.
Okay, yes, she is.