July 17, 2009


Since she doesn't have a job and is apparently not currently stalking Samantha Ronson all over Europe, it's time to bust out the "Lohan is the New Marilyn Monroe!" bullshit schtick she and her Boil on the Ass of Society Mother Dina are so fond of.

Because we Americans aren't totally stupid, Lohan has taken her stoned dog and pony show over to Spain and is currently "gracing" the cover of Vogue Espana, looking like some washed up adult store mannequin. What is it with these Lohan offspring? Lohan herself is quite possibly the oldest looking 22 or 23 year old on the planet and younger sister Ali, rather than looking her actual 15 years, looks as though she's a divorcee who's been prowling through a Las Vegas casino all night, for some sugar daddy to buy her a Long Island iced tea.

The cover proclaims her the "new" Marilyn. Uh, yeah. If she's going for the 36 year old, drug addicted, bloated and newly dead Marilyn then I would say yep, Lohan's got that one sewn up.

Seriously. Lohan people. Give it a rest. Lohan will never be the new Marilyn. She is not even remotely in the same league with Marilyn Monroe, unless you count personal problems.

Shouldn't her 15 minutes have been up eons ago? And since Spain put her on their magazine cover, can they keep her?

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